From the Vault: Sigh Frontman Says ‘There’s No Way to Get Away From Death’

A couple of weeks ago, Mirai Kawashima—frontman of Sigh, one of Japan’s longest-running metal bands—published a two-sentence Facebook post that summed up both his current state of mind and his band’s latest material. And the thought he shared didn’t even mention Sigh.

In true metal form, Kawashima wrote: “So I turned 53 today. There’s not much difference between 52 and 53, but obviously 53 is 1 year closer to death.”

And, in true Facebook form, the oblivious top comment read: “Happy Birthday!!”

It’s obvious to say, but Kawashima (who is also a music journalist) couldn’t have posted that remark were he a day younger. But that fact is worth noting because, when he spoke with The Bad Penny ahead of Sigh’s latest album, the vocalist and bassist explained that he couldn’t have made Shiki at a younger age, either.

Tying it all together, Shiki is about Kawashima’s increasing obsession with death as he gets older. Compounded by the passing of his father the month before we spoke with him, Kawashima explained how death was an abstract concept to him, until he turned 50 years old.

He also talked with The Bad Penny  about how, despite his obsessive thinking, he continues to keep his body in the best shape he can, how bringing in veteran metal musicians helped Sigh create arguably their best album to date, and why pandemic lockdowns expanded his already impressive music-playing abilities.

Were you confident when you picked the musicians to comprise Sigh’s new lineup that it would the band’s best one yet?

Well, right now we have Nozomu Wakai (who joined Sigh last year). He’s a great guitarist and has a lot of experience with great musicians. He had a band (Destina) with Tommy Aldridge, the famous drummer, and Ronnie Romero, who’s now Rainbow’s singer.

He can do some visual design too, so he designed our backdrop and some other props. Our stage looks a lot better now thanks to him. So he knows a lot about great music and great designing; he’s the best guy we’ve ever had in our band.

Sounds like you killed two birds with one stone. Has it helped you save money too, having a band member who can play dual roles?

Yes. Before, when we’d tour, we’d play as a four-piece. We usually have five members. But because the airfares are insanely high these days, we have to cut some costs. So, I used to just do vocals, but now I’m also playing bass again. It’s impossible for us to bring five or six members to the U.S. because the airfares are almost double or triple what they were before COVID. It’s crazy. I’m sure all the musicians are struggling with it.

International musicians wanting to tour the U.S. have it even tougher. How hard was it to pick up the bass again?

Well, I’m not a technical bass player, and our rigs are pretty primitive, so it’s not hard for me. And all of the songs were basically written by me, so I know the notes inside out. It’s not very difficult.

Have you toured the U.S. before?

No, but we played at the Mass Destruction (Metal Fest) in Chicago.

Speaking of festivals, how did Brutal Assault go?

Oh, it went very well. The reactions were great. That was our first concert with our new lineup. We didn’t play for three years because of the pandemic, so it was like a new start. It was a great experience.

How did that gig feel different compared with your last few gigs before COVID?

Other than the lineup change, I didn’t feel any difference. I’m 52. When you’re in (your 40s and 50s), time flies. Three years is like a blink. (Laughs) So I didn’t feel any gap. Now we have the strongest lineup ever, but other than that, it was the same as usual. Same stage setup, same feeling of excitement.

Do you think you’ll come to the States again soon?

I hope so. Now we’re talking about some European dates, and its’s very easy to play those countries because they don’t require a visa. For the U.S., the visa is a big problem. But hopefully we’ll make it out there again soon.

Going into the making of Shiki, what did you want to do differently this time around? 

At the very beginning, I was thinking of making something like (1993’s) Scorn Defeat, our debut album. I wanted to make something primitive and straightforward. But, in the end, it turned out to be the way it became.

That’s always how it is: First, I write the album. Then I keep arranging the songs again and again and again. And it becomes totally different. So, it happened again. Still, some of these songs do (still sound) a bit primitive. The first song, “Kuroi Kage,” has some simple riffs, and the song is pretty straightforward. So you can still hear some of the remnants of my first vision.

Did you revert to that older style because you’ve been getting into black metal again? Or was something else the catalyst?

Well, this time, the big difference was that I played the guitar while I was writing the songs. That’s what I did when I made the first two albums. But after that, I started using keyboards more, writing scores to make songs. This time around, I picked up the guitar again because of the lockdowns. I didn’t have anything to do, so I got back into the guitar.

Did you also write a lot more material than usual because of the lockdowns?

Yeah. Actually, I tried to learn some other instruments—like the Japanese flute I used on the album. I wrote a lot of songs and practiced my instruments a lot. It was a good time for me.

Are you responsible for the saxophone parts too?

The saxophone is played by our female vocalist, Dr. Mikannibal. I want to learn how to play saxophone too, but I haven’t studied it yet.

What were you most pleased with when you finished the record? And what surprised you the most about it?

This time, the drums were played by Mike Heller from Raven and Fear Factory. The guitar and bass were played by Frederik Leclercq from Kreator (and Dragonforce). That is the biggest point. Mike is a super drummer, and Fred is a great guitarist, so they didn’t have any technical limitations at all.

To be honest, with past albums, I had some frustration about other members’ technical limitations, both in the studio and on tour. I’d write some riffs, and a guitarist would say they couldn’t play this or that. But Mike and Fred can play anything. They played even much better than my expectations. So I didn’t see any point that could’ve been better when the album was finished. That is the biggest satisfaction for me for sure.

Can you talk about the lyrical content of the song? I haven’t been able to get my hands on the lyrics yet.

Yeah. A large part of the album is about my personal fear of getting old and my personal fear of death. Sigh have been dealing with death since the very beginning, but when you are 20 or 30, it’s still something fictional. Of course, you have to die someday. But it’s very hard to imagine you’d die today or the day after, when you are young. But when you are over 50, all of a sudden, that becomes something real. Unfortunately, you start losing your friends. I lost my dad last month. So death is a harsh reality now. 

When I was making the album, I was totally full of a fear of death. So the album, in large part, is about how I fear death. I wouldn’t call it a concept album, but my personal fear of death is the main theme.

Do you have high anxiety or trouble falling asleep at night?

Actually, not much. I feel a little depressed thinking about death. There’s no way to get away from death. If you think about it, it’s really scary. The only way (to deal with death) is to try not to think about it. Other than that, there’s no cure for that.

Surely, by making Shiki, you’re helping some listeners work through their own struggle with death. Am I correct that 2005’s Gallows Gallery was about sadness, and 2007’s Hangman’s Hymn – Musikalische Exequien was about anger and hate. Do you have an emotion tied to each Sigh record?

I think so—but it’s not intentional. The lyrics came out of me, so there’s something in common for sure. Shiki is the most honest, straightforward (Sigh album). I wanted to express myself as honestly and straightforwardly as possible. So that’s why I had to use my own language 100% this time.

“Shiki” means a lot of Japanese. It means “time to die,” “four seasons,” “conducting an orchestra,” “ceremony,” “colors.” There are so many meanings in Japanese. But the main focus here is “time to die” and “four seasons.” If our lives have four seasons, it will be late autumn when you are 50. It’s about fear of getting old. Only winter comes after autumn. And, unfortunately, then spring won’t come.

By the way, you look great for 52.

Well, I’m losing my physical and mental strength for sure, unfortunately.

What about your speed and dexterity with playing instruments? Have you noticed any change there?

Actually no, because I’ve been working out pretty hard these days, to resist my senility.

(Laughter.)

So I still feel good onstage. I haven’t felt weak. I don’t [fall] out of breath onstage very easily, luckily. I try to work out pretty hard every day.

What kind of workout do you do?

The typical things, like chin-ups, sit-ups, push-ups, and riding the bicycle machine.

It sounds like, even though you’re thinking quite a bit about death, you still enjoy living life. How has your outlook on life changed since you started the band?

I’m a very pessimistic person. I was never an optimistic person. I always expect the worst. I’m very cautious.

Do you get any joy from positive outcomes that you didn’t think would happen but that do?

You mean, joy? Yeah, that always happens. Because I always think of the worst-case scenario, the outcome is always better than that.

Even when I started Sigh, I expected nothing at all. I never even thought we’d be able to release a single album or play at a big festival in Europe. So everything is pretty much rewarding. 

Can you recall a certain point in your career when you knew you were onto something? I hesitate to use the word “made it,” because just about every band is always trying to better itself.

Probably playing at some European festival, like Hellfest. That was a point I thought we made something. Nothing great, but something, at least. Also, when I read some of the reviews on the internet for younger bands, and they said, “This is for Sigh fans.” That meant people were aware of our existence. When I read that, I felt at least Sigh existed. Because if you aren’t noticed, you don’t really exist, in a sense.

Plus it suggests a certain amount of stature, if you’re used as a reference point. How has the size and makeup of Sigh’s audience changed over the years? And are you generally accepted in Japanese culture?

Here in Japan, we are not big at all. The extreme metal scene itself is very small. Even Emperor came to Japan and played for 800 people or something.

Oh my God.

It’s crazy. Japanese metal fans are really into bands like Helloween and power-metal bands and Arch Enemy. But black metal, death metal, and extreme metal is very small. Of course, we are known in the scene. But in general Japanese culture, nobody knows about black metal. All they care about is J-Pop. We are not a celebrity at all.

Is that freeing, being somewhat anonymous at home but knowing you have a large presence elsewhere in the world?

Actually, I don’t care. Heavy metal only has a universal scene, so it doesn’t matter where you reside. I grew up listening to heavy metal bands from Europe and the U.S. mainly. I never thought about metal bands being big in Japan or Europe. It doesn’t matter.

It must’ve been pretty cool when you roped in Frederik Leclercq from Kreator, then.

Yeah, it was. I grew up listening to a lot of Kreator, so that kind of thing is a great experience. Another point where I felt like we made something is I can talk to some of my heroes, like Voivod or Venom or Kreator or Destruction—when I was a kid listening to them, I never thought about knowing them or even meeting them in person.

Is that one of your favorite aspects of playing festivals?

Definitely. 

Do you introduce yourself?

Yes. I’m not shy at all.

What size venues are you playing now?

In Europe, about 800 people, which is not bad. Usually 400 or 500 at maximum, if we headline. In Japan, it’s smaller, like 100 or 200.

Do you feel like Sigh have had a slow growth over the years?

I think so, because I’ve been getting more reactions from Shiki than usual. It seems like it’s getting bigger slowly but steadily.

It seems that’s a better trajectory to be on, because when a band shoots up, they tend to fall just as sharply. It must feel gratifying to know you’re bringing in new fans.

Yeah, and after 32 years. I never thought we would keep playing for 30 years. When you’re 50 and still have new fans, it’s a great thing.

My favorite metal song of the year is “Satsui.” That riff is so tight. How did that song came about?

Actually, I don’t remember. I wasn’t sure about it, actually, because the riff is very simple and monotonous. I was not sure if people would like it — but I didn’t care, because I (eventually) felt the riff was strong enough (to carry the song).

To be honest, I was not expecting a lot from the “Satsui” video. I thought people might not like it. But it’s gotten the best reaction so far. It’s hard to predict reactions from fans. The song is about my personal view on the death penalty. So it’s about a topic. That one is not about my fear of death. 

Have you written about that topic before?

No, this is the first time. In Japan, we still have the death penalty. These days, there are a lot of murders and horrible thing happening. To be honest, I sometimes feel the murderers had more rights and were treated better than the victims because on the TV here, the victims’ names are published and the murderers’ aren’t. Which is crazy.

Shiki is an album that only the 50-year-old me could make. Because I always wonder, “What’s the point in making an extreme metal album when you’re 50?” Thrash metal and extreme metal were strictly born for young people in the ‘80s. So I always wonder why I should make an album like this at 50. So, this album is an answer to my own question.

And you could only make this album at 50 because that’s when the fear of death hit you in a real way?

Yes. It’s not a fantasy. It’s a real fear I have. Shiki is the darkest album by Sigh because it’s about real darkness. It’s not about imaginary (scenarios). Making an album like this can’t be a remedy to soothe the fear of death. I just have to live with it.

This article was originally published in February 2023 via New Noise.

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